I Saved A Baby.

No really, I did. My one year old niece locked herself in her parents car today. No idea how but she did. Being the way I am, I go and grab a couple of metal clothing hangers, my multitool, and I get to work building my car lock pick (I’ve done this many times, don’t ask). 

While I’m busy building my lock pick, mom is freaking out and calls the Police, Fire department, EMS, U.S. Army, Navy Seals, Delta Force, President Obama, everyone!  So just as I’m getting started on the lock half of the city shows up. The Fire Department starts working on the passenger side trying to break in since I am already on the driver door. Their big idea? Wedge the door wish an arm collar, like the one the doctor (Not Doctor Who) uses. So they shove that into the door and start pumping.  By the time they were done I already had the window down and was unlocking the car. I was a damn hero!

What happened next? The fire fighters and the EMS guys all shook hands with each other, congratulating each other on a job well done, and they left. Only one person acknowledged me afterwards, the cop who first arrived on the scene. To that Cop, thank you. To the fire fighters and EMS… at least you showed up quick. Thanks for nothing though you ass hats. My child would have been of more use to me today in that situation than seven fully trained, grown men, and she is missing a chromosome. I wish I could read the report they turn in today…

Anyway, that really all happened then we went to ride Airboats and watch a man wrestle an alligator. Yay!  

Coopertown Airboat Rides
HELL NO
The Florida Everglades.

So yeah, that was my day. I didn’t get any pictures of myself saving a baby because I was busy saving the baby… you know how it goes.

Author: Beal

I have responsibilities, a job, kids, bills. This little page is the only thing that lets me remember the thrill of creativity I once took for granted in my youth. I hope you enjoy my failing mental health.

2 thoughts on “I Saved A Baby.”

  1. Good for you! It’s hard to do a hero selfie while the hero stuff is still happening. It’s actually kind of scary that was the solution the “professional heroes” came up with…

    Nothing in this world would ever make me want to approach those alligator creatures. I can’t even imagine trying to wrestle one.

    Like

    1. I was blown away by the lack of professionalism. They were literally just waiting on me. Their only other solution, break the window. Luckily the AC was still on so the baby was fine. I just wish we had pictures. It was a unique moment. As far as Gators are concerned, I was close enough to take a photo… and thats too damn close.

      Liked by 1 person

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